Watching a child get married is one of the most memorable moments in a mother’s life, right up there with her own wedding. So, as the mother of the groom, special thought and consideration should be placed into finding a gown that will show off your VIP status, especially when it comes to the color of your dress.
That's why, to help you understand the nuances of dresses for mothers of the groom, we consulted with fashion stylist Vanessa Valiente to break down everything you need to know. Read on for our expert-approved fashion advice, including what color to wear and shopping tips to help you find the perfect ensemble.
Meet the Expert
Vanessa Valiente is a fashion stylist based in San Diego, California. She began her career in 2006 styling celebrity talent including Eric Dane, Rhona Mitra, Bo Derek, Morgan Fairchild, and Joe Manganiello.
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What Color Is the Mother of the Groom Expected to Wear?
The short answer: it depends. "The mother of the groom is expected to meet the formality level of the mother of the bride and bridesmaids," says Valiente. "Get the opinion of the couple for colors you should or shouldn't wear, and don't wear anything more formal than the bride." After that, as long as it falls within the above parameters, mothers of the groom should feel free to wear whatever color fits their unique, personal style.
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If your son has given you free rein to choose a color for your day-of look, your final choice should be dependent on the dress code, venue, and season. In general, jewel tones and earthy hues, like emerald green and burgundy, work well, in addition to universally flattering colors like black and navy. Valiente also adds, "Wear a flattering color that compliments the color palette of the wedding."
However, a great rule of thumb to follow (no matter how much autonomy you have in choosing your look) is to consult with your son and his partner for inspiration and direction. Some couples may ask their parents to coordinate with the wedding party, so make sure you check with the couple before you start shopping.
The Top Colors for Mothers of the Groom to Avoid
As with any wedding guest, it’s best to avoid wearing white or any color that resembles the bride's wedding outfit. You may also want to steer clear of blush, beige, or other light neutral tones that may appear lighter on camera. "And do not match the bridal party colors unless requested to do so," adds Valiente.
It doesn’t hurt to send a picture of your prospective wedding outfit to the couple before you buy it, just to be on the safe side.
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What to Look for in a Mother-of-the-Groom Outfit
When shopping for a mother-of-the-groom outfit, you want to buy something that makes you look and feel incredible. "The mother of the groom is just as valuable a participant in the wedding as the mother of the bride, but communication is key," says Valiente. "Don't shop until you are sure there are no requests from the bride and groom. When in doubt, wear a dress that makes you feel great, compliments your skin tone, and doesn't upstage the bride."
As you’re shopping, keep in mind the silhouette you'd like to sport, too. Wrap styles are flattering on nearly any and all body types, along with a tasteful V-shaped neckline to help elongate the silhouette. Lastly, if you’re not sure where to start shopping, retailers like Nordstrom, Net-a-Porter, and BHLDN offer gorgeous gowns for every wedding style, from elegant eveningwear fit for a black-tie wedding to chic satin maxi dresses perfect for fall or winter nuptials.
FAQ
When should I start shopping for my mother of the groom outfit?
To be on the safe side, we suggest that you start shopping for your dress six months before the wedding. This ensures that everyone has plenty of stress-free time to have alterations made if necessary. If you’re in a pinch, many e-commerce sites, like Net-a-Porter or Nordstrom, offer rush shipping.
Should the mother of the bride and mother of the groom wear different colors?
Generally yes, according to Valiente. "Open communication is key to nailing the color selection," she says. "If the mother of the bride is matching the bridesmaids' color palette, the bride and groom might request the mother of the groom to also match. But if no one has asked the mother of the groom to match the bridal party, it's best to choose a different color, but not one that clashes." Wearing variations of the same color that coordinate with the rest of the wedding party is a great way to complement the color scheme without being too matchy-matchy. The moms can also differentiate their looks with jewelry, shoes, as well as their hair and makeup.
Does the mother of the groom get ready with the bride?
It's customary for the getting ready suite to be reserved for the bride and her bridesmaids. Unless the bride says otherwise, make plans to get ready at the hotel or another location. However, we do suggest stopping by the bridal suite a few hours before the ceremony—while the wedding party is getting ready—to give the bride your best wishes.
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