Questions every maid of honor needs to ask her bride right away.
It’s a bold statement, right? But totally necessary. Being a maid of honor is a big deal. It’s a lot of responsibility put on one person’s shoulders. At face value, it may not seem like it’s a lot of work, but you never know. You never know until you ask, anyway.
That’s where questions every maid of honor needs to ask her bride right away comes in. These are the kind of questions that will allow you and the bride to get on the same page. The same page when it comes to how much time you’ll spend on her wedding. How much money you’ll spend. The answers may surprise you. However, knowing what you’re getting into before you get into it will save you, and the bride, hurt feelings and surprised moments later on.
31 Questions Every Maid Of Honor Needs To Ask Her Bride Right Away
This post is going to give you thirty-one questions every maid of honor needs to ask her bride right away. In some cases, you may have already asked the questions. If so, awesome. In other cases, you may want to skip asking some questions. Again, you do you. These questions are just suggestions to help you understand your level of involvement in the bride’s wedding. They are also for the bride to understand how much you can offer her wedding, so she can adjust her own expectations accordingly. You’re there to support each other, and this level of communication is critical.
Let’s get into it.
EVERY MAID OF HONOR NEEDS TO ASK QUESTIONS ABOUT PRE-WEDDING EVENTS AND THE TIMING OF IT ALL
How can a maid of honor participate if she doesn’t know the plan?
Being a maid of honor is so much more than just showing up to the wedding. In most North American countries, maids of honor are heavily involved in pre-wedding events. This may mean planning, or at least attending, engagement parties. The same goes for bridal showers and bachelorette parties. Usually, a maid of honor will go with the bride to look for her wedding gown. And, of course, there is the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.
Each maid of honor needs to ask questions about pre-wedding events so she and the bride can both be on the same page with her involvement. Whether it’s just attending the event, or being part of the planning, you both need to know what the expectation is.
Here are the questions about pre-wedding events every maid of honor should ask:
- Are you having an engagement party?
- If no engagement party is planned, do you want one?
- When do you want to have your bridal shower?
- When do you want to have your bachelorette?
- What’s your vision for your bridal shower?
- What’s your vision for your bachelorette?
- When are you going to go dress shopping?
- Do you want me to come when you go dress shopping?
- Will there be a rehearsal dinner?
- Can I bring a date to the rehearsal dinner?
EVERY MAID OF HONOR NEEDS TO ASK QUESTIONS ABOUT WHAT TO WEAR TO THE WEDDING
No matter who you are, you’re going to put some consideration into what you wear to a wedding.
I mean, yes, we all know some dudes who don’t think that hard about it. But, for the most part, and especially for the ladies, we do.
When you are a part of a bridal party, you’re often instructed with what you should wear to the wedding you’re in. This may mean that the bride actually picks out a dress for you to buy and wear. She may also give some guidelines with cut, color, fabric, and things like that. Alternatively, brides may let their bridal party wear whatever they want. No matter the situation, maids of honor need to ask the questions about what they should wear, how they should accessorize, and about hair and makeup.
Here are the questions about what to wear and how to look that every maid of honor should ask:
- What do you want the bridesmaids to wear at your wedding?
- What accessories or shoes do you want your wedding party to wear at your wedding?
- Should we budget for hair and makeup for your wedding?
EVERY MAID OF HONOR NEEDS TO ASK QUESTIONS ABOUT THE WEDDING DAY ITSELF
Alright, let’s talk about wedding day logistics.
Here’s the thing. Maids of honor usually do not just show up to a wedding. They often get ready with the bride. Stepping in to help. Paying attention, and being present. Knowing things like when the wedding is, travel expectations, allowance to bring a date, saying a speech, and extra expenses are all essential. Not only so you can be the best maid of honor ever, but so you can plan properly and according to the bride’s vision.
Here are the questions every maid of honor should ask about the actual wedding day:
- What time do I need to start getting ready with you on your wedding day?
- When is the wedding?
- Do I need to book a hotel or other accommodations for your wedding?
- Can I bring a date to your wedding?
- Do you want me to say a speech at your wedding?
- Are there any extra expenses I should plan for, for your wedding?
EVERY MAID OF HONOR NEEDS TO ASK QUESTIONS ABOUT HELPING WITH THE WEDDING
As I mentioned above, maids of honor are a part of the wedding. They have a place in the “wedding crew”, so to speak.
This means that every maid of honor needs to ask her bride about helping out. Before, during, and after the wedding. For example, does the bride need help with DIY projects? With wedding planning? How about items to bring to the wedding? This may include emergency kits or special requests. Maybe the maid of honor will help make sure there is food to eat while everyone is getting ready. Or, she may help with the set up or clean up of the wedding itself.
Here are examples of questions every maid of honor needs to ask about helping with the wedding:
- Do you need help with décor or any DIY projects?
- Can I assist you with any wedding planning?
- Do you need any extra wedding resources?
- Will your venue need help setting up?
- Do I need to bring an emergency kit to your wedding?
- Will your venue need help cleaning up at the end of the night?
- Can I bring anything special to your wedding?
- Do I need to arrange for snacks or food for when we get ready?
EVERY MAID OF HONOR NEEDS TO ASK QUESTIONS ABOUT THE BRIDE’S WELL BEING
Last section! Maids of honor are there to support brides. And, we all know that wedding planning can be stressful. So, if you’re a maid of honor, you should be checking in with the bride.
This means asking questions about the bride’s well being. How she feels about the wedding. Her relationship. Her family being at the wedding, or their involvement with her relationship. It’s not that you need to give advice or take on the stress from the bride. It’s more about being a listening ear to her, and offering empathy where appropriate.
Here are examples of questions that every maid of honor should ask about the bride’s well being:
- Are you nervous about anything to do with your wedding?
- Do you need or want any wedding or relationship advice?
- Are you concerned with anyone in your family or wedding party negatively affecting your wedding?
- Is anything about the wedding stressing you out?
THOUGHTS ON WHAT EVERY MAID OF HONOR NEEDS TO ASK HER BRIDE
Friends, I know there are many, many more questions that every maid of honor needs to ask her bride out there. And, depending on the wedding, some of the questions in this post may not be needed. However, this is a good starting point. Questions help us understand the vision and expectations we all have with a situation. They get us all on the same page and help us avoid drama and confusion in the future. Ask away, and feel good about doing your due diligence. Enjoy being a part of a wedding!
More On Maids Of Honor From Hummingbird Wedding Advice
Unbelievable Maid Of Honor Mistakes (That Are Easy To Avoid)
Can You Have More Than One Maid Of Honor?
Maid Of Honor 101
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